To poop or not to poop?

And THAT, my friends, is the real question as to whether or not to poop at work. Now, if it is an emergency and you just can't wait until you get home I can totally understand that. But, there are some people who schedule their poop time to occur during working hours. How do I know this? Because they are in there every day at the same time dropping the kids off at the pool. And since I am always in the office, it is my poor nose that takes the full brunt of the offending odors. I don't know if it's just me, but if I can smell it, EVERYONE can smell it. And it would be to my utmost embarassment if anyone knew that I even performed such a function. So it makes me wonder if these people are just oblivious to their bodily smells, or they just don't care, OR (even worse) they do this on purpose to make me woozy and nearly faint every time their butt vapors escape the confines of the flimsy wooden bathroom door. To defend my sensitive olfactory system, I have purchased several cans of Febreeze, that I put in the bathrooms, which has performed immense and innumerable miracles which I am forever in their debt (that is only if they use the spray and if not I run through the entire office spraying my own can which I keep on my desk). I am very grateful that the majority of people have the same opinion that I have that they perform whatever tasks necessary to ensure not a single whiff escapes the confines of the bathroom and everyone is none-the-wiser for what has just occured. I just wish that the 1 or 2 serious offenders would realize that, yes, their poop DOES smell, so take care of it! We have informally banished one person already to use the port-a-potty outside and far away from civilization...but alas there is always someone once a day that leaves a Pepe Le Pew stink trail through my office. I wish I weren't the only woman in the office, someone save me!